Top Five Tips On How To Beat The Blues This Valentine’s Day
Let’s face it, Valentine’s day can be an emotional roller coaster for some, depending on your Facebook relationship status. Many argue it has been hijacked and commercialised by businesses to make money. Others argue it is a way of showing love, appreciation and respect for the one you love. For those of us not in a relationship, it can highlight and ‘rub salt’ into the wound of failed affairs. The question is how can one day have so much influence over our emotions?
While 5% of our conscious mind understands how ludicrous this seems, 95% of our subconscious mind is emotionally searching for ways to feel good about the whole situation. Therefore, no matter what you tell yourself, you still feel lousy. The feelings of loneliness, failure, and not being good enough are amplified even though I’m sure you already know this, but it is just another day and you are perfect just the way you are!
Sooner or later, we all realise that allowing someone else to have power over our happiness, is like driving a car from the back seat. You are powerless to control your destination. And you may or may not have already noticed but happy people don’t need others to feel good about themselves or their emotional state.
The reality is, if you find yourself in this situation on Valentine’s Day, you will need to work through your own feelings and emotions. No one can do that for you. Here are my top five tips which hopefully will help.
Keep away from social media
Do not stalk your ex on Facebook or Instagram hoping to see them sad and lonely. It’s not going to happen. Also, avoiding your feeds, which may compound the anxiety of seeing friends and family having a great time, while you lay on the couch. Research has proven that users have a distorted view of ‘friends’ lives because we interpret things differently. Comparing yourself to others has been proven to amplify negative feelings. Your job right now is to feel great, not gloomy.
Why not pamper yourself?
Yes, go ahead and pamper yourself. After all, you know exactly what makes you happy. Use it to your advantage and redeem the offers, promotions to indulge on your needs. If you’ve got your ex a gift, return it and spend the money on yourself. Let this Valentine’s day be a day to LOVE YOURSELF.
Spend some time with your friends and family.
They can always put a smile on your face and having a laugh is the best medicine. Not to mention how friendships reduce stress and boost happiness. Life is to short to be by yourself why not have a night out, karaoke singalong, or belly laugh at the comedy festival. Like the well-known hit single by Cyndi Lauper state “Girls Just Want To Have Fun”, and so to the blokes, so just do it!
Read a book and get lost in it.
If you’re not an adrenaline junkie and you cherish your alone time, what more can I say than, I hear you. There is a time for everything. Knowledge is a great superpower and no one can ever take it away from you. Why not read a biography of someone that inspires you, or learn something that will add value to your life. Download an audiobook and a great resource I share with my clients is Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It. Read the novels you love and get lost in their world so you don’t leave room for your mind to wander. This is your time, spend it wisely.
Start planning your future.
Studies have proven that long term goal setting does not work. But on the contrary, a 90-day plan can get you excited, especially because you start seeing momentum quickly. There is nothing wrong with daydreaming about a better life but action will get you outcomes. Ask yourself, what do you want out of life? Where do you see yourself in the near future and how can you achieve it?
And here is a bonus tip, If I told you the instructions for your life are on the outside of the box you live in, would you find a way to read them or stay locked inside?
Instead of worrying about others this Valentine’s Day why not show yourself a good time. Be kind, be caring, and treat yourself the way you want to be treated. Happiness starts on the inside and it is the greatest gift you can give yourself, now and always.